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Shots being used in a New Girl drinking game

It's Jess! The New Girl Drinking Game

New Girl is a perfect show for relaxing on your couch, in your pajamas, with a cup of hot tea (or a glass of wine, whichever is your speed). But who says your private pleasure has to stay solo? I would argue that binge-watching New Girl can easily be turned into a party-ready activity. All you need is a drinking game!

The quintessential New Girl drinking game is True American, but it’s tricky for a number of reasons.

  • We never find out the real rules in the show
  • You must have at least one castle’s worth of beer, so you can’t just play with whatever booze you have on hand.
  • And the big one: You can’t play True American while watching New Girl.

Unlike True American, you can play this drinking game while you watch the show, with any number of people, and with any kind of booze. It’s flexible like that.

Set Up 

First rules first, one person starts as Jess. This person doesn’t have to be a woman, anyone can be Jess. Potential ways to decide include: have a sing off, vote for the player most in touch with their feelings, have a found-object crafting competition, see who is the best at New Girl trivia, or just roll some dice and highest number wins. It’s up to you.

The role of Jess is like the role of thumb master. Jess can make the floor lava. When Jess shouts “True American” everyone has to get their feet off the floor and the last one to touch the floor has to take a shot. Then, that person becomes Jess (so no one gets power hungry).

Take One Drink When...

  • They drink.
  • Nick is a bummer.
  • Nick fails at being an adult.
  • Someone flirts with Cece.
  • Schmidt talks about Cece.
  • Something in the apartment breaks.
  • Jess makes someone talk about their feelings.
  • The guys are a little… too close.

Take Two Drinks When...

  • Jess bursts into song, does an impersonation, or is kind of annoying.
  • Someone says, “Tighten Up.”
  • Nick and Jess try to play off their chemistry.
  • Jess is naïve.
  • Schmidt talks about clothes, style, or any sort of personal grooming.
  • Winston pulls a prank.
  • Someone mentions that Nick is a law school dropout.

Finish Your Drink When...

  • Schmidt puts money in the douche jar.
  • Winston and Schmidt fight over who is Nick’s best friend.
  • Someone has family issues.
  • Jess references Dirty Dancing.
  • Remy (the landlord) suggests a threesome.
  • They play True American.

If you’re playing along at home, I suggest adding custom rules for each episode you watch. This works best if you’re watching for the second (or third, or more) time. 

Last Updated: September 14, 2015